Give me two minutes and I'll show you something about stress. so stress is the physical aspect of anxiety, the fear emotion. Stress is how anxiety shows up in our bodies. It comes with things like an increased heart rate, shallow breathing, muscle tension, stomach problems and headaches. So take a second right now and check your back and shoulders do you feel any tension there? Odds are good that you do so go ahead and relax. No really, relax. Relax! Now for most of you this did not work it most likely actually made things worse so now you may be feeling stressed out about feeling stressed out this is the paradox of emotions the more we try to make them go away the more we magnify them but all is not lost that does not mean that we are powerless over our emotions we just have to go in the back door sometimes so try this instead notice an area of your body that's feeling tense it may be your shoulders or your face or your back or your hands now I'm going to ask you to lean into that tension so with the shoulders example I want you to try to exaggerate that tension pull them up hard and tight around your ears clench and harden those muscles really feel those muscles tighten and hold it for five seconds it helps if you scrunch your face okay now soften those muscles breathe out let's do it one more time tense tighten. Now check in with your shoulders. For most people this helps them soften and relax those muscles in a way that they weren't able to do by just trying to relax. And that's the curious thing with emotions they don't respond well to being dismissed ignored or avoided. Often they're just asking to be noticed or acknowledged it's like our stress is saying "hey just notice me for a second and then I'll move on" but when we are constantly trying to keep our emotions at arm's length our emotions act more like a toddler saying" Mom mom mom mom!" "what?" and when you finally give them your attention they say "I went potty on the potty" And you say "Oh good job you're the best" and the kid moves on now if we really want to have choice with our emotions we have to be willing to spend a second and lean into them. Comment below what are the emotions you're most afraid to sit with for a second . Thanks for watching and take care! I'm excited to announce my upcoming course called "How to Help: Powerful tools to help when someone you love struggles with mental health" I'll be including some videos here but the full course is on udemy.com and is going to include over 40 instructional videos outlining specific ways to help someone with depression anxiety or other mental health concerns
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